29 Comments
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James Kerner's avatar

This is a wonderful piece. There does need to be a special explanation when a terrorist cuts off a woman's breasts and plays catch, or hammers nails into a labia. I think you are spot on in your analysis, though I would also include envy as a motive: envy of the Israeli liberated women and the men who can date them freely. Envy of the beauty that is there for all to see, without a hijab or burka to hide femininity.

Steve S's avatar

Could not relate at all to this essay, though I found it entertaining. Going back through the generations in my family and relations, cannot think of one man who was physically or mentally weak, or what this writer might characterize as feminine. My father, his brother, and a few uncles were decorated WWII soldiers. I served in law enforcement for 28 years with a number of strong and capable Jewish men, a few women as well. One of my sons is a decorated Army Ranger who saw combat in Afghanistan and Iraq. Just cannot relate.

Matthew Huggett's avatar

Comparisons can also be drawn with the Reformation in Christianity which attacked Catholicism as effeminate, being so attached to the Virgin Mary and all those celibate non-violent saints. The Orthodox had their Iconoclasts earlier with similar complaints.

April's avatar

Great post. I live in a neighborhood where women or maybe women parade around in short shorts and keffiyehs. I’ll never forget the twenty something pink haired girl bar tender lecturing me in a whiny voice about “the Palestinians”. What would they do with pink haired girls who sell alcohol in revealing clothing?

Robin Alexander's avatar

Fascinating. Never read anything even approaching this theory. Wow.

Meghan Bell's avatar

Daniel, have you read Leonard Shlain's "The Alphabet Versus the Goddess"? (Shlain was Jewish). You might find it interesting.

My husband (also Jewish; I'm not) and I have been discussing the link between misogyny and antisemitism, and suspect it has something to do with Iain McGilchrist's (The Master and His Emissary) hemispheres theory.

In short, we've been speculating that both misogyny and antisemitism are related to a dysfunctional or unhealthy right hemisphere and over-active left hemisphere (loosely, the RH is the "prey" part of our brains, the half primarily responsible for authentic human connection, non-verbal communication, connection to nature, connection to God/Spirit/Elohim; the LH is the "predator" half, primarily responsible for processing our interactions with objects, and is more mechanistic, black and white thinking, and narcissistic). Causes of RH dysfunction and hypo-function would include childhood emotional neglect and abuse (according to Yasmine Mohammed's book, child abuse and emotional neglect are very common among Islamic extremists -- as they were in pre-Nazi and Nazi Germany).

According to McGilchrist, the LH can essentially take off and think it no longer needs the guidance of the RH. I suspect this is more likely to occur if the RH is traumatized -- emotional trauma would disproportionately impact the RH. This would result in a disconnection from God, which intuitively could also be projected as hatred of those blamed for bringing ethical monotheism into the Middle East and Europe (this can also include a literal interpretation of religion, ie one based on a literal reading of a text instead of on a "sense" or intuition of a higher being). Shlain argues that the left hemisphere is also inclined toward misogyny.

I think there's a lot more going on here but I'm still puzzling it out.

Daniel Saunders's avatar

This is a fascinating comment! I will need to think about it and digest. McGilchrist has been on my "to read" list since I saw a YouTube video of a lecture he gave some months ago.

Meghan Bell's avatar

I haven't read this one (yet) but my husband is in the middle of The Great Partnership by Rabbi Sacks and apparently there's a decent amount of overlap between it and The Master and His Emissary, but Sack's has more of a religious lens (obviously) and is a bit easier to read.

Daniel Saunders's avatar

I have actually read that, but a long time ago. I was actually thinking of re-reading.

Sarah Whelan's avatar

Thank you! Having a theoretical framework for the horrifying tide of hate in my former cultural/political home reduces the hopelessness and confusion I've felt since October 7.

Tanto Minchiata's avatar

This is an interesting essay. Clearly, being judged as effeminate did not do us Jews any favors anywhere, at any time. People are, underneath whatever veneer of civilization they wear, prone to disrespect those who they see as weak or fragile. If they aren’t going to love you, it’s better that they see you as capable of violence and potentially dangerous rather than harmless. I don’t make the rules, but there are rules. That’s why it would be useful to terminate Hamas, Hezbollah, the Mullahs Bronze Age style. They don’t understand anything else.

Alex Fox's avatar

Fascinating essay. In contrast to some of the other comments, I will say that I completely understand and relate to your observations of Jewish male culture. Instead of (and perhaps in rebellion against) the Greek ideal of "a sound mind in a sound body," the spiritual and intellectual domains are often perceived - particularly among Ashkenazim - as being the sole legitimate focus of energy, while sports and fitness are "for stupid people."

Your references to the early Zionists is great, but I would add one name that is conspicuous by its absence: Meir Kahane. Founder of the Jewish Defense League, Kahane was an Orthodox rabbi who was blacklisted as a terrorist, largely because he advocated for American Jews to acquire the skills and weapons to defend themselves.

Shelah Horvitz's avatar

This is so good I have a feeling I will need it someday, so I saved it off. I have read all these points before but you organize and articulate them beautifully.

Laura's avatar

I'm sure it's especially galling for far-right antisemites to see a militarily powerful and dominant Jewish nation since they stereotype Jewish men as effeminate and weak pushovers who they can easily bully.

Sarah Whelan's avatar

Thank you for this post- it needs to be circulated in every university, "peace" group, and Democratic Party gathering. I am alienated from these spaces because of the blindness to the misogyny of the carefully packaged "Palestinian" narrative.

Elaine's avatar

I don’t think the rapes have anything to do with feminine/ masculine. It’s all to do with the jihadist ideology. They don’t believe that they go to heaven or get “martyrs” points if they kill a woman, only if they kill a man. (Im not kidding). Their goal is to humiliate and psychologically destroy Jews anyway they can. Raping the women with their guns and knives was like a bonus prize for them. They are barbaric monsters.

Noah's avatar

I suggest to remember when the Talmud was codified, that in addition to instructing how to be Jewish, it sought to keep Jews alive. An example is how the rabbis reconstructed Hanukkah by inventing the story about the magical lamp, while minimizing the story about a successful Jewish rebellion. The Jewish wars against Rome decimated Jewish presence in Israel/Judea/Samaria, and Jews were scattered throughout Europe, Mesopotamia, and Arabia. Jewish women learned how to be survivors, and Jewish men needed to develop a new mindset, one that did not identify masculinity with fighting, war, battle, territorial expansion, or picking fights with strangers. The days of Jewish armies would not reappear on the world stage until 1948, when our inner strength burst through in a way that hadn't been seen for 2000 years. And before anyone breaks their arm patting themselves on their backs about how Jewish men only use their strength to protect and defend, know that Jewish and Israeli men also rape and abuse Jewish and Israeli women. And for the same reasons Hamas brutalized the women on October 7th.

Just Boris's avatar

"The rapes of October 7th were a brutal attempt to feminise the Jewish People and assert masculine Islamic dominance over them."

Or to save you crafting this complex argument, 'The rapes of October 7th were the work of religious fanatics, thuggish barbarians whose culture subjugates women.' Ain't nothing wrong with 'masculine' and 'feminine', it is just what those terms mean within cultures. Strong men are not strong because they are bullies or thick-as-pigshit rapists like brainwashed Hamas' acolytes.

Liba's avatar

I would disagree that Jewish men in Tanach are seen as weak. Two examples: Jacob pushes the rock off of the well when he meets Rachel; the Midrash describes Yoseph’s brothers as tremendously strong in the final meeting in Egypt. True, this strength was a natural outcome of their spiritual strength.

Also, although the Nazis did not livestream themselves (obviously), many of the photographs we have were taken by the Nazis themselves.

Daniel Saunders's avatar

I was going by the peshat/literal meaning.

I think Nazi soldiers were officially banned from taking photographs precisely because the leaders didn't want evidence. The photos we have were taken surreptitiously.

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Feb 13, 2025
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Liba's avatar

Jacob moving the rock is p’shat.

Daniel Saunders's avatar

Yes. I concede that point! I don't think alters the thrust of my argument.

Liba's avatar

Your point is very interesting.

JD's avatar

Something I really admire about some cultures is their acceptance of different beliefs and attitudes within their nation and at the same time having a very uncompromising nationalism; India and the Philippines comes to mind.

However, within the Jewish community every new opinion, everything that could be considered a change in doctrine becomes a new wall separating community from community.

In the Tao Te Ching it says "Nothing in the world is as soft and yielding as water. Yet for dissolving the hard and inflexible, nothing can surpass it."

Mongolian wisdom states that a single twig can easily snap but a bundle is very strong.

So let us accept our variations in all their varieties.

If an intellectual has an effeminate limp hand that's just fine.

But anti-Israel and/or Anti-Semitic Jews should find no sanctuary among the Jewish people.

Ro's avatar

Agreed. I rolled my eyes at that portion and gave up. If the author is so worried about what Torah study will do to him he should get a grip strengthener ($7), a gun, and then get back to the books. It’s not complicated and certainly doesn’t merit a whole exposition.

Mike Dearing's avatar

To paraphrase Simone de Beauvoir: 'masculine/feminine" is a male construct, by which she meant a product of patriarchy, a world in which the male is dominant; otherwise known as the manosphere by some today. Ideas about male superiority abound. So, masculine and feminine become defined accordingly; and hence we get notions of gender dysphoria, etc, too complex to elaborate here.

Moving on: a "phobia" is defined as an irrational fear/hatred, so in that regard I can see the link between misogyny and antisemitism as each being an extreme manifestations of such a thing.

Furthermore, it seems that Islamist extremism promotes hateful and degrading attitudes towards women more strongly than other religions. No surprises that Andrew Tate recently found Islam more to his own tastes than formerly.

As an aside, I'm amused to read that Esau begat the rest of humanity; how else to explain his siring the Romans? As it happens. the Greeks regarded the Persians as effeminate, and in turn the Romans felt likewise about the Greeks; and so it has always gone on; which brings us back to notions of masculine/feminine.

Gang/group rape is also, sadly, a common thing around the world, desperately hard to prosecute as well, as seen all to often in recent times; think of cases in Delhi, Barcelona; and not so long ago, one in Cyprus that related to a group of young Israelis, many of whom were on leave from the IDF. Maybe it's the ultimate boy's #MeToo, as in 'Can I join in?'

Rape is a uniquely terrible thing, depriving a person of both dignity and agency, and the horror of what happened on October 7 will never be erased. Misogyny is firmly embedded in jihadism; on October 7 it was manifested via rape to accentuate its antisemitism. We do not need to find a causal link other pure hatred.

BTW do get back to me about #MeToo: while it is now true that there are many hypocrites in the world who would call themselves feminist, those who complain about it most loudly are the reason for the 'crie de coeur' in the first place.