Supporting Jews at every stage of life, and in every condition of life. I ran into this last year when I had to say Kaddish for my father. I am a member of a synagogue; we pay insane amounts of money for it. But they don't have a daily minyan. Thankfully, I found an online Sephardic minyan, and these wonderful people have welcomed me in, even though I am not Sephardic. But I should not have had to do this. Supporting people who need to say Kaddish is kind of a central function of a synagogue.
Also, it would be nice for at least some synagogues to recognize that some people are immunocompromised and vulnerable to infectious disease. It would cost absolutely nothing to have a few mask-required services here and there so that these folks can safely attend. When my father was dying of cancer, I could not go to any synagogue services because I could not risk infecting him. I am not the only one in this situation.
Very well put and you are absolutely correct. Engagement at every opportunity is exactly what you want. To all of this I have to add, no more machers. In almost every shul I have been a member of, a praetorian guard of machers blocks the synagogue leadership from both new members and those who are there to see if this place is for them. These folks have to be told, in no uncertain terms, move off. Let the newbies find their way without having to learn the secret handshake. The clique culture that operates in our communal organizations is one of the biggest off putting elements that drive people away. Knock it off.
An interesting analysis of contemporary society, with absolutely no mention of any spiritual significance—and HaShem, the one who created us, never mentioned.
Some provocative thoughts in this essay. Most of the suggestions require resources that those of us in small communities simply do not have. Some have said to us that we should move to larger communities and for many reasons that is rejecting the reality that many small jewish communities have vibrant lives and do so on meagre budgets. The author goes on to portray potential members from the perspective of consumers waiting for something to happen to them and then contradicts themselves by saying that those consumers will become engaged with various levels of outreach. Fair enough. I am drawn to the argument that consumers will become engaged, because this suggests that the consumers at some point have to become engaged, whatever level outreach is presented. The consumers, at some point, have to do something. And this brings us to a fundamental lesson from Torah, reinforce through the ages, that at some point Jews must do something and not just wait around for the right message or the right enticement. So yes, a diverse outreach is called for, and at the end of the day, every Jew must decide for themselves whether to take even the smallest of steps.
When the Jewish people stood before Mt. Sinai when G-D descended on it in Fire and Glory, there was no concern about how to run a synagogue.
If G-D is not the center and heart of all things you have empty truths masquerading as meaningful purpose. For the SPIRIT of ELOHIM alone will fill a place with purpose and meaning that goes beyond the understanding of man.
You don't go to a Synagogue with demand that it must meet and maintain your expectations. G-D must be the center and forefront, the very foundation of every synagogue. People come to Synagogue not to learn about Jewish life, but to worship, love and submit to G-D's Holiness, Salvation, Truth and Authority. Only then do you live a meaningful life.
It's never about numbers, attendance, membership, social programs and so on. It's only about G-D and nothing else, for HE alone is the GIVER of Life. If you try to live outside of G-D's Will then you live with an empty soul filled with falsehoods that creates blind pride that destroys your spiritual truths. You become 'I Think It Should Be This Way' instead of 'G-D's Authority'.
And that attitude has its origin in rebellion and sin--not the Holiness of G-D.
Never once did Moshe teach anything other than what G-D commanded. The Tent of Meeting was designed exactly as G-D commanded. The Priestly garments were made exactly as commanded.
No one ever came about and said we need to do things another way during the days of Moshe--and when they did, in the Book of Judges, they ended up dead in sin and being punished by G-D.
Without G-D's Holiness all things are dead and mortal men and women simply apply their ignorance to their wounds in order to pretend they are still in control and know what is best.
Proverbs Ch 9:10 The fear of ADONAI is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of holy ones is understanding.
Ok, I'm really tired of people saying Jews aren't welcoming enough to interfaith families and that's the only real problem with interfaith marriages. My mother is Jewish and my dad's not, and my sister and I went to a Reform synagogue (so not a fringe movement) in the 90s, and being half Jewish was basically a non-issue. The problem I've experienced, both in my own family and in the interfaith couples I know in my social circle as an adult, is antisemitism from the non-Jewish side of the family, and in the examples I'm thinking of, this includes the non-Jewish spouse, even when they agree to raise the kids Jewish. There's one woman who I used to be friends with, who has only ever said negative things about Judaism to me even though her husband and both kids are Jewish. (I don't really consider myself pathologically people-pleasing, but maybe I was being a little too agreeable with her.)
Also, I've seen articles where non-Jewish spouses talk about why they feel like outsiders at synagogues, and the reasons given are things like them being the only non-Jew there or people assuming that everyone there is Jewish, which are not problems synagogues need to fix. Synagogues are Jewish spaces. If you're not Jewish, you're perfectly welcome to come in as long as you're going to be respectful, but it's not actually for you. The expectation that non-Jews should never feel the least bit uncomfortable or weird is unreasonable. It's like being a straight person married to a bi person and complaining that you feel like an outsider at the Pride parade because you're the only straight person there. So what? Not to mention that the fact that in most of the world outside the synagogue, it's the Jewish spouse who is the outsider. The non-Jewish spouse can deal with the situation being reversed for three hours once a week.
What makes me feel uncomfortable as a kid from an interfaith family is how the people who are loudest about inclusion keep erasing my actual (and not uncommon) experience so they can tell the Jewish community they're not being nice enough. This is one of the reasons I quit the synagogue that I used to be a member of.
Supporting Jews at every stage of life, and in every condition of life. I ran into this last year when I had to say Kaddish for my father. I am a member of a synagogue; we pay insane amounts of money for it. But they don't have a daily minyan. Thankfully, I found an online Sephardic minyan, and these wonderful people have welcomed me in, even though I am not Sephardic. But I should not have had to do this. Supporting people who need to say Kaddish is kind of a central function of a synagogue.
Also, it would be nice for at least some synagogues to recognize that some people are immunocompromised and vulnerable to infectious disease. It would cost absolutely nothing to have a few mask-required services here and there so that these folks can safely attend. When my father was dying of cancer, I could not go to any synagogue services because I could not risk infecting him. I am not the only one in this situation.
Very well put and you are absolutely correct. Engagement at every opportunity is exactly what you want. To all of this I have to add, no more machers. In almost every shul I have been a member of, a praetorian guard of machers blocks the synagogue leadership from both new members and those who are there to see if this place is for them. These folks have to be told, in no uncertain terms, move off. Let the newbies find their way without having to learn the secret handshake. The clique culture that operates in our communal organizations is one of the biggest off putting elements that drive people away. Knock it off.
An interesting analysis of contemporary society, with absolutely no mention of any spiritual significance—and HaShem, the one who created us, never mentioned.
Some provocative thoughts in this essay. Most of the suggestions require resources that those of us in small communities simply do not have. Some have said to us that we should move to larger communities and for many reasons that is rejecting the reality that many small jewish communities have vibrant lives and do so on meagre budgets. The author goes on to portray potential members from the perspective of consumers waiting for something to happen to them and then contradicts themselves by saying that those consumers will become engaged with various levels of outreach. Fair enough. I am drawn to the argument that consumers will become engaged, because this suggests that the consumers at some point have to become engaged, whatever level outreach is presented. The consumers, at some point, have to do something. And this brings us to a fundamental lesson from Torah, reinforce through the ages, that at some point Jews must do something and not just wait around for the right message or the right enticement. So yes, a diverse outreach is called for, and at the end of the day, every Jew must decide for themselves whether to take even the smallest of steps.
You forgot to mention how political alignment by a temple can override an extensive menu offered that you described.
Very well said!
When the Jewish people stood before Mt. Sinai when G-D descended on it in Fire and Glory, there was no concern about how to run a synagogue.
If G-D is not the center and heart of all things you have empty truths masquerading as meaningful purpose. For the SPIRIT of ELOHIM alone will fill a place with purpose and meaning that goes beyond the understanding of man.
You don't go to a Synagogue with demand that it must meet and maintain your expectations. G-D must be the center and forefront, the very foundation of every synagogue. People come to Synagogue not to learn about Jewish life, but to worship, love and submit to G-D's Holiness, Salvation, Truth and Authority. Only then do you live a meaningful life.
It's never about numbers, attendance, membership, social programs and so on. It's only about G-D and nothing else, for HE alone is the GIVER of Life. If you try to live outside of G-D's Will then you live with an empty soul filled with falsehoods that creates blind pride that destroys your spiritual truths. You become 'I Think It Should Be This Way' instead of 'G-D's Authority'.
And that attitude has its origin in rebellion and sin--not the Holiness of G-D.
Never once did Moshe teach anything other than what G-D commanded. The Tent of Meeting was designed exactly as G-D commanded. The Priestly garments were made exactly as commanded.
No one ever came about and said we need to do things another way during the days of Moshe--and when they did, in the Book of Judges, they ended up dead in sin and being punished by G-D.
Without G-D's Holiness all things are dead and mortal men and women simply apply their ignorance to their wounds in order to pretend they are still in control and know what is best.
Proverbs Ch 9:10 The fear of ADONAI is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of holy ones is understanding.
Shalom and blessings.
Ok, I'm really tired of people saying Jews aren't welcoming enough to interfaith families and that's the only real problem with interfaith marriages. My mother is Jewish and my dad's not, and my sister and I went to a Reform synagogue (so not a fringe movement) in the 90s, and being half Jewish was basically a non-issue. The problem I've experienced, both in my own family and in the interfaith couples I know in my social circle as an adult, is antisemitism from the non-Jewish side of the family, and in the examples I'm thinking of, this includes the non-Jewish spouse, even when they agree to raise the kids Jewish. There's one woman who I used to be friends with, who has only ever said negative things about Judaism to me even though her husband and both kids are Jewish. (I don't really consider myself pathologically people-pleasing, but maybe I was being a little too agreeable with her.)
Also, I've seen articles where non-Jewish spouses talk about why they feel like outsiders at synagogues, and the reasons given are things like them being the only non-Jew there or people assuming that everyone there is Jewish, which are not problems synagogues need to fix. Synagogues are Jewish spaces. If you're not Jewish, you're perfectly welcome to come in as long as you're going to be respectful, but it's not actually for you. The expectation that non-Jews should never feel the least bit uncomfortable or weird is unreasonable. It's like being a straight person married to a bi person and complaining that you feel like an outsider at the Pride parade because you're the only straight person there. So what? Not to mention that the fact that in most of the world outside the synagogue, it's the Jewish spouse who is the outsider. The non-Jewish spouse can deal with the situation being reversed for three hours once a week.
What makes me feel uncomfortable as a kid from an interfaith family is how the people who are loudest about inclusion keep erasing my actual (and not uncommon) experience so they can tell the Jewish community they're not being nice enough. This is one of the reasons I quit the synagogue that I used to be a member of.