The Total Neglect of an Ongoing Hostage Crisis

While mass casualties of war in Gaza are absolutely devastating, I think it’s easier to view pictures of war than it is to view video footage of sadistic evil.

The “Mothers’ Silent Cry” rally to stand with the family of Naama Levy who’s held hostage in Gaza (photo: Hostage and Missing Families Forum)

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This is a guest essay written by Jen Gilman Porat, who writes the newsletter “The Holy Chutzpah.”

You can also listen to the podcast version of this essay on Apple Podcasts, YouTube Music, YouTube, and Spotify.

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Every day, I observe members of the writing community accuse Israel’s military operation in Gaza of genocide.

In almost all of these instances, there is no mention of the hostages. There is also no mention of the rape and barbarism that occurred on October 7th. That hostages, even child hostages, remain in Gaza is of no concern. That these hostages are very likely being raped is of no concern.

But I don’t believe you.

Which means: I don’t believe you are really okay with sacrificing children stolen from their beds.

Statements come from individual writers. They are also issued by organizations such as literary magazines, small presses, and so forth. There have been blacklists and open letters.

When our most celebrated writers, artists, and intellectuals demonize Israel’s military operation in Rafah, without any mention of the hostages that remain in Gaza, they are helping to normalize such hostage-taking. Moreover, they are normalizing rape & barbarism.

But I don’t believe you.

Which means: I don’t think you really want to normalize rape and hostage-taking. I think what happened on October 7th is actually so heinous and terrifying, you simply cannot tolerate the reality of it. It’s preferable to blame the victims. While mass casualties of war in Gaza are absolutely devastating, I think it’s easier to view pictures of war than it is to view video footage of sadistic evil.

Real care for humanity in the Middle East demands expansive empathy, the kind that doesn’t try and solve brutal conflict by framing it as a mere math equation.

According to the Western formula, the plight of Gaza is worse than that of Israel because the death toll is higher. Of course, we don’t even know the truth of any numerical claims, as the reporting is coming from the Ministry of Health run by Hamas. When the UN reduced the estimated death toll by half, did anyone amend their outrage by fifty percent — of course not — because human horror cannot be quantified.

So why are you able to neglect the trauma that occurred on October 7th?

Even if there were no hostages, there is no numerical score that could quantify the terror and horror endured by the murdered, the raped, and those who survived. Barbarism lacks temporal ends. It is infinite. The trauma endures through time and space, impacting everyone who lives in Israel and all of us who are connected to Israelis.

You think you’ve solved a moral equation, but you have not. There are hostages remaining in Gaza. Do you think we should abandon them? If yes, then say it. At the very least, take ownership over your neglect, because you are indeed failing to acknowledge the moral dilemma facing Israel.

But even if you manage to articulate the words — abandon your hostages — even then, I will doubt your confidence level.

I still would not believe you. I don’t believe you would be willing to ask the same sacrifice of your own children. Your own family members.

Am I wrong?

Prove it.

Here’s one way to demonstrate your righteousness:

1. Gather your children. Place them in front of the television and play all the footage from October 7th. Show them the murders and the rapes. Let them watch how a woman’s breast was chopped off and thrown around for sport. Make them witness how Hamas raped girls until they died from internal damage. Show them how babies burned in ovens, how men were decapitated, how families were burned alive.

2. After they’ve endured hours and hours of vicarious trauma, tell them that some people, including children like themselves, were kidnapped. Explain that there are still children missing. Show them pictures of all the kids. Make sure to humanize the missing. It’s going to be difficult to include relatable details, but you must. Your children need to understand that Israeli children also love pizza and french fries. They too enjoy dancing and playing sports. They like long cuddles at bedtime, just as your children do.

3. Do not stop this process (step 2) until your child demonstrates identification with Israeli children. You’ll know when they ask questions like: “What if that happened to me? What if I were kidnapped by Hamas? Would anyone try and get me back?”

4. This next step is crucial. You must tell your child that yes, it is possible that a terror organization might kidnap them, but no — you will not come look for them. Explain to your child how not only will you not insist the world fight for them, but how you will also ask your friends and followers to divest from any economic entity that tries to do so. Your children must know that their lives are simply not valuable enough. They must pay with their bodies, perhaps be sold into sex slavery. They must remain open to this price.

5. If your child cries at this point or complains that it’s not fair, give them the big picture. Perhaps say this: “Honey, you are just one kid. If we tried to find you, we might end up killing thousands of other kids. Would you rather entire families be killed together in an act of war? Or would you rather be raped and tortured by Hamas so that nobody else dies?”

6. You must video record all of the above steps. I want to see how your children respond. How your moral arguments—your numerical compromises—get translated in reality. We need proof that you’ve told your children how their names will never be mentioned again. That if a sympathetic neighbor were to hang their picture up on nearby street signs, you would express no outrage when others tear it down.

7. If your child is especially clever, he/she might ask: “Why doesn’t the whole world make Hamas set the children free? Why blame Israel when Hamas has the leverage of human lives?”

8. Answer your child.

Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe you and your children, after enduring this experiment, will remain committed to the total neglect of an ongoing hostage crisis.

You already know you can’t prove it. You couldn’t force your child to suffer through even the first step of my experiential proof. You can’t prove your moral position. Doing so would require causing mental harm, harm that no trigger warning could shield against.

Of course, you don’t have to engage in moral experiments.

You think you have nothing at stake.

I’m not convinced of this either. When hostage taking gets normalized, can any person, Jewish or not, Israeli or not, know they’re immune to future terror?

No. Of course not. You cannot know when and where the next round of terror will strike.

Don’t normalize hostage-taking or rape or barbarism. Express your outrage. Your silence is inhumanity.

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