How to Talk With Pro-Palestinians: A Guide

Enjoy this satirical piece about folks who seem to care so much about human rights, "liberation," and sociopolitical grievances — but only for God's gift to the world, the honorable Palestinians.

photo by Dmitrii Eliuseev

Please consider supporting our mission to help everyone better understand and become smarter about the Jewish world. A gift of any amount helps keep our platform free of advertising and accessible to all.

---

You can also listen to the podcast version of this essay on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, and Spotify.

Share this essay using this link: https://www.futureofjewish.com/p/how-to-talk-with-pro-palestinians-a-guide

---

Welcome, dear reader, to a sophisticated and absolutely foolproof guide on how to talk with “pro-Palestinians.”

This guide is designed for those moments when you find yourself at a cocktail party, a family gathering, or perhaps a spontaneous social media debate, faced with someone who is fervently “pro-Palestinian.”

Talking to “pro-Palestinians” can be challenging, but with this guide, you will be well-equipped to navigate these conversations with ease. Remember, the goal is not to reach a deeper understanding or find common ground (haha).

It is about maintaining your composure, appearing reasonable, and avoiding any substantive change in your viewpoint — in synchronous lockstep with “pro-Palestinians” of course.

With our carefully curated strategies, you will navigate these conversations with the finesse of a diplomat and the acumen of a seasoned debater.

So go forth, dear reader, and engage with your “pro-Palestinian” counterparts.

Step 1: Master the art of feigned understanding.

The first rule of engagement is to nod sagely at everything your “pro-Palestinian” interlocutor says. This not only demonstrates that you are an active listener but also gives you a few precious moments to formulate your response.

A well-timed “I see where you're coming from” can work wonders. It creates an illusion of empathy without committing to any actual stance. Remember, the goal here is not to agree, but to appear reasonable.

Step 2: Deploy the ‘both sides’ argument.

Nothing diffuses a heated political debate like the good old “both sides have their issues” tactic. It is a timeless classic.

When your conversation partner mentions the exhaustive, forever-victim plight of Palestinians, you counterbalance by highlighting the ongoing struggles of Israelis. Here are a few examples:

• Since as early as 1834, way before Zionism was even a figment in the Jews’ imagination, Palestinians raped and pillaged through Jewish communities in Ottoman-era Palestine as part of their “Peasant Revolt” — which was prompted by Egyptian conscription demands on these peasants. Because, why not take out your frustrations on the Jews, who have nothing to do with your problems?

• Palestinian governments pay their people, as a matter of policy, to kill Israelis. The worse the terror attack, the more cash they dish out. And I am not just talking about Hamas. The more “moderate” Palestinian Authority does it too.

• Whereas Israelis are mostly surgical in operations against Palestinian terrorists, Palestinians are mostly indiscriminate in their attacks against Israelis, holding nothing back against children, women, and the elderly.

This tactic works because it implies a false equivalency, suggesting that the conflict is a simple tit-for-tat rather than a complex issue with deeply rooted historical, religious, and ethnic nuances. It is like saying, “Both sides in World War II had their reasons” — but with a straight face.

Step 3: Invoke historical context, selectively.

History is a powerful tool, especially when used selectively. When talking to “pro-Palestinians,” it is crucial to bring up historical points that serve your narrative while conveniently ignoring others.

For instance, mention the ancient Jewish presence in the region, but gloss over the centuries of “Palestinian” (i.e. Arab) habitation.

And make sure to seldom use the word “Palestine” — because this country never existed in any form, ever, neither as a government or a kingdom. And yet it was the Jews who on 10 different occasions, since the 1930s, have been willing to share the land, two states for two peoples, because that is what adults do. They compromise and share.

Of course, we know the world infantilizes the Palestinians to depths unseen by any other group of people, past and present, thus eternally excusing the Palestinians of any responsibility or blame within the Israeli-Palestinian saga. It is always the Jews’ fault, no matter how accommodating the Jews have been.

But we know that “pro-Palestinians” are not big on facts — just finger-pointing Jew blame — so stick with this selective invocation of history to create a flimsy spiderweb of authority and depth in your arguments.

Step 4: Ask them to be more empathetic to the Palestinians’ sworn enemies. You know, the Jews.

As one “pro-Palestinian” Jew recently wrote me, “If an innocent German 5-year-old boy died in a bombing campaign in 1940, I would still have empathy. I would also understand the geopolitical circumstances, and the necessity of it. And I would obviously support it. But I would still have empathy for an innocent human. If we lose sight of the humanity of our enemy we can never move forward.”

Of course, this Jew has never experienced war, terrorist attacks, or any of the other BS that Palestinians have compulsively gifted Israel over the years. And one has to wonder if this “German 5-year-old” was being raised by Nazis. If so, is this child really “innocent” — in some eyes yes, in others no.

But in Israel, we do not have the luxury of having this philosophical, hypothetical debate. Israelis have been living with real-world, virulent, antisemitic Palestinian terrorism on their borders for decades, and October 7th was just another rendition of it.

While we were grabbing our children and hurrying them to bomb shelters as Palestinians celebrated the October 7th massacres, and as we have been grieving the losses of our family, friends, soldiers, fellow citizens, and hostages since then — while fighting an existential war — we simply do not have that much mental space to entertain empathy for our sworn enemies who for decades have championed and tried to act toward their goal of our destruction. Shame on us, I guess.

But maybe “pro-Palestinians,” many of them living in ivory towers, can make space for said empathy. Try it out and see how it works for you.

Step 5: Emphasize the complexity to avoid acknowledging anything about anything.

One of the most effective ways to stall a conversation is by emphasizing how incredibly complex the issue is. Repeatedly highlight that the Israeli-Palestinian conflict is “not black and white” and that “there are no easy answers” and that it is “just a terrible situation for everyone involved.”

This tactic works because it sounds intellectually honest while subtly implying that any strong stance (such as being staunchly “pro-Palestinian”) is overly simplistic. It is the verbal equivalent of throwing your hands up in exasperation and saying, “Who can possibly understand this mess?” when a child throws a tantrum and knocks their full cup of milk off the table.

Step 6: Deploy the humanitarian deflection.

Whenever your interlocutor gets too passionate about the suffering of Palestinians, deftly pivot to a broader humanitarian concern. Talk about your deep worries for all innocent lives caught in conflict zones worldwide.

Mention Syria, Yemen, Myanmar, or even historical tragedies like Rwanda.

This has a twofold effect: It dilutes the specific focus on Palestinian suffering and positions you as a universally compassionate person, rather than someone entrenched in a single issue who exhibits unexplainable selective outrage about a group of people (the Palestinians) who many “pro-Palestinians” actually know next-to-nothing about and with whom they have no real connection.

Step 7: Invoke security concerns.

Security is a trump card in any discussion about the Middle East. Argue that Israel has a right to defend itself, a point that is hard to refute without appearing to condone Palestinian violence, more specifically October 7th.

When your “pro-Palestinian” counterpart discusses disproportionate force or civilian casualties, respond with something like: “It’s tragic, but security is paramount — no less for the women and children in Israel.”

Then remind them, respectfully of course, that Gaza is not the only place which has women and children who are in harm’s way. Contrary to public opinion, Israel does too.

Step 8: Employ whataboutism.

“Whataboutism” is your friend, even your bestest of friends in certain situations.

If your conversation partner mentions Israeli settlements, respond with: “But what about Palestinian kleptocracy, terrorism, and corruption?”

If they bring up the blockade of Gaza, counter with: “What about Egypt on the other side of the other border with the Strip?”

If they bring up women and children, counterpunch with: “What about all the women and children in Israel? Do Jews not deserve the same level of security and safety as well?”

This technique diverts attention from the original issue and bogs down the conversation in a mire of competing grievances, making it difficult for any productive discussion to continue — which is exactly what many “pro-Palestinians” aim for anyway.

Step 9: Bust out the ultimate trump card — agreeing to disagree.

When all else fails, fall back on the ultimate conversation stopper: “Let’s agree to disagree.” This phrase is a polite way of saying: “I’m not interested in changing my mind, even if I am exposed to new information and perspectives that invalidate my previous beliefs — and I doubt you’ll change yours.”

It is a graceful exit strategy that ends the debate without conceding any points, allowing you to walk away with your dignity intact, your views unchallenged, and most importantly — am yisrael chai.¹

---

1. A popular Hebrew saying that means, “The nation of Israel lives!”